I’ve literally been counting down the hours since I recovered from my Cinco de Drinko hangover (2pm)

There have been 13

I hope I don’t have to poop on the plane

Why the fuck would you buy On the Border brand salsa in fucking New Mexico?

You know, I never appreciated wifi as much as I did today when I wanted to Facebook/Tumblr while in the bathroom.

Oh remember that time when an RA, RHC and 2 cops came to my door at midnight to dump out my beer because they saw it while inspecting the room to see if it needed painting?

Cuz I do

indognito:

autumn-motionless:

innercheeseburger:

imelvish:

pin-ku-ru:

an-ominous-figure:

theatomicboom:

chasingnargles:

hermionegrangerandarocketship:

gallifreyanwizard:

theonewiththepotatoes:

michackles:

kickofpassion:

The phone sits silent.
I await a text from him.
Forever alone.

An elegant shade
adorns a rose covered lamp.
It’s tacky as shit.

The wall’s very white
With only one poster up
It is quite boring 

I like my puppy

Bijoux is tan and fluffy

I enjoy him much

Wall I love you wall

I do When we’re apart my

my heart beats for you

bowl of leftover chips

i don’t want you anymore.

jump into the garbage. 

big ass television set

you have graphics better than anything

i want to watch Deathly Hallows

Long green lace curtain,

why are your edges so frayed?

What am I doing.

Empty bottle of tea

You calmed down my thirst

now burn in hell

Couch of comfiness
My black couch is thuglicious
let me love you couch.

Glorious lantern, 

It’s light shines with brilliance. 

Why is it here, though?

To the left, to left
Everything I own in a
box to the left left

Big fuzzy blanket,
My body is ready now.
Get on top of me.

beer bottles ugh mexican beer tastes like piss why did i buy you

EDIT: Wowwwww way to make a haiku Ben, you totally even know how to press the Enter button and put things on another space

This one apparently

“Just be careful about bar hopping.  Someone’s uncle will see you there and report back to the family and then the whole town will know!!  Just saying…”

I want to respond IDGAF